Monday, January 05, 2004
Well, it is officially 2004!
The last couple of weeks have been so hectic. I am relieved to finally settle down into some sort of a routine. I am such a creature of habit that the last month has torn me apart, both physically and emotionally. But now it is time to start afresh. It is time to move forward and to implement some new direction into my otherwise directionless lifestyle.
Here’s a brief recap of 2003’s bitter end:
New Year’s Extravaganza
Kelly, Angie, my parents and I spent New Year’s Eve together. We went out to an overly priced, not very good tasting dinner. Afterwards, we played charades and a game that I had created all on my own. And yes, there was a prize for the winner. At 11:30pm, the five of us walked 25 steps to the center of Times Square. For a half an hour we were brutalized by the thousands of people that were crammed into the heart of the city, ready to ring in the New Year. It was a bit scary, but totally exciting. The jumbotron above our heads counted down seconds to the New Year and we all screamed and screamed and screamed. At midnight the five of us hugged and kissed as best as we could, and tears streamed down my face. It was one of the most memorable moments of my life.
Luckily, we only had those 25 steps to walk to get back to my apartment. Upon arrival, we grabbed our bottle of champagne, went to the roof and watched the rest of humanity try to fight their way to freedom. It was completely overwhelming and I’ve never been so proud to live in Times Square in my life. We were all part of something that we will (hopefully) never have to do again. But it was amazing to do it once.
At 1am, Angie, Kelly and I went down to Paul’s apartment and the night continued to be hectic and random. Initially we were locked out of Paul’s apartment and we spent a half an hour drinking beers and smoking in his hallway. It was hilarious and awesome. Around 2am, Mariah came home and we partied until 6am.
I woke up on New Year’s Day with a horrible hangover and the flu of death. I watched 4 hours of Punked with Angie and Mariah and went out to dinner. After that I spent the next four days coughing my lungs out and sleeping in my bed. Not a great way to start the New Year, but there was no other option. I’m just glad that I’m FINALLY feeling better. And much thanks to Angie who supplied me with enough Cranberry Juice and DayQuill to get me up and out of my bed on Sunday.
The Sad Death of Kimberly
On New Year’s Eve, my darling little hamster Kimberly walked over to the little car inside her cage, laid her head down and breathed her last breath. Over the Christmas holiday, she seemed to age at an extraordinary rate. Out of nowhere. I spent the days leading up to New Year’s with her sitting in my lap watching TV. I could tell that she was about to go. She received a proper burial in the garbage can on 46th and 7th. I plan on buying a new baby sometime this week.
The Unbelievable Recovery of Jim
Wouldn’t you know it? Little Jimbo, who has had the life of misery since the beating Kimberly gave him, is now running around like a mad man. He is fully healed and is going out of his damn mind. He has learned to use his gimpy leg and runs so fast on his hamster wheel that I am convinced he’s going to knock it off its track. I think he knows Kimberly is dead and he is surely celebrating. The little guy has a second chance at life and I couldn’t be more pleased. All that TLC and hydrogen peroxide I used made him all better.
My Biggest Challenge
After 6 and a half years of smoking a pack a day, I have decided to give it up once and for all. I have made attempts at quitting in the past, but I have never felt so strong in my resolve as I do now. It has been 48 hours and although I am getting panic attacks and moments of tear inducing anxiety, there is no way that I am going to return to the life I once led. I want out and I want out now. I need the money, I have a desire to be healthy, and I don’t want to be a smoker ever again. Enough is fucking enough. Be strong Joe. Be strong.
My Lil’ Accident
8 hours after quitting smoking, I had a seriously bad moment. I was in the shower, radio blasting, when Paul decided to wash the dishes. I had shampoo in my hair, body all soaped up and was hit with an onslaught of scalding hot water. I backed away from the stream of pain and started screaming at Paul to stop washing the dishes. He couldn’t hear me over the sound of the radio so I reached out of the shower to turn the volume down. Without any warning, my feet gave out from under me and I plunged headfirst onto the bathroom floor. I twisted my ankle and smacked my head against the wall. The pain was excruciating and the tears came immediately. Paul heard me fall and ran to the bathroom door, but it was locked. I reached up and unlocked it and he gasped when he saw my soapy body huddled on the floor in tears. He tried to move me, but the pain was unbearable and I began to throw up in the toilet. It was awful. Eventually he helped me back into the shower so that I could rinse the soap off my body and out of my hair.
Some Bad News
My brother called my family on Friday and told us that he will not be able to come home in January. His leave time was cancelled. We are obviously devastated. When he is released in May, it will be 13 months since we have seen him.
The Theatre Company
Rehearsals start tomorrow for our upcoming AIDS Benefit. I have yet to memorize my monologue and will be spending the next 24 hours doing just that. I am SO glad to have some acting to look forward to. A friend of ours is now doing guest spots on One Life to Live and the fire inside of me burns to be where he is right now. By the end of year…by the end of the year…
My Hair
is wildly out of control. Someone grab the hedge clippers and meet me in the parking lot.
The Real World
Yes I saw Danny’s boyfriend Paul and I have to say…WHA HAPPEN? Paul used to be HOTTTTT. But now Paul is scraggly and skinny. Wha happen?
Also, thank you to MTV for showing The Real World: New Orleans from beginning to end. It was just what this sick boy needed.
The Sims
I got the Sims game for Playstation 2 for Christmas and I have already spent at least 56 hours on it. It’s kind of an irritating game that is mind numbingly addictive. Someone help me help myself.
Adios
That’s it for today.
Hope everyone had a JOYOUS and FUN New Years!
Here’s to a better year. For all of us.
Peace.
The last couple of weeks have been so hectic. I am relieved to finally settle down into some sort of a routine. I am such a creature of habit that the last month has torn me apart, both physically and emotionally. But now it is time to start afresh. It is time to move forward and to implement some new direction into my otherwise directionless lifestyle.
Here’s a brief recap of 2003’s bitter end:
New Year’s Extravaganza
Kelly, Angie, my parents and I spent New Year’s Eve together. We went out to an overly priced, not very good tasting dinner. Afterwards, we played charades and a game that I had created all on my own. And yes, there was a prize for the winner. At 11:30pm, the five of us walked 25 steps to the center of Times Square. For a half an hour we were brutalized by the thousands of people that were crammed into the heart of the city, ready to ring in the New Year. It was a bit scary, but totally exciting. The jumbotron above our heads counted down seconds to the New Year and we all screamed and screamed and screamed. At midnight the five of us hugged and kissed as best as we could, and tears streamed down my face. It was one of the most memorable moments of my life.
Luckily, we only had those 25 steps to walk to get back to my apartment. Upon arrival, we grabbed our bottle of champagne, went to the roof and watched the rest of humanity try to fight their way to freedom. It was completely overwhelming and I’ve never been so proud to live in Times Square in my life. We were all part of something that we will (hopefully) never have to do again. But it was amazing to do it once.
At 1am, Angie, Kelly and I went down to Paul’s apartment and the night continued to be hectic and random. Initially we were locked out of Paul’s apartment and we spent a half an hour drinking beers and smoking in his hallway. It was hilarious and awesome. Around 2am, Mariah came home and we partied until 6am.
I woke up on New Year’s Day with a horrible hangover and the flu of death. I watched 4 hours of Punked with Angie and Mariah and went out to dinner. After that I spent the next four days coughing my lungs out and sleeping in my bed. Not a great way to start the New Year, but there was no other option. I’m just glad that I’m FINALLY feeling better. And much thanks to Angie who supplied me with enough Cranberry Juice and DayQuill to get me up and out of my bed on Sunday.
The Sad Death of Kimberly
On New Year’s Eve, my darling little hamster Kimberly walked over to the little car inside her cage, laid her head down and breathed her last breath. Over the Christmas holiday, she seemed to age at an extraordinary rate. Out of nowhere. I spent the days leading up to New Year’s with her sitting in my lap watching TV. I could tell that she was about to go. She received a proper burial in the garbage can on 46th and 7th. I plan on buying a new baby sometime this week.
The Unbelievable Recovery of Jim
Wouldn’t you know it? Little Jimbo, who has had the life of misery since the beating Kimberly gave him, is now running around like a mad man. He is fully healed and is going out of his damn mind. He has learned to use his gimpy leg and runs so fast on his hamster wheel that I am convinced he’s going to knock it off its track. I think he knows Kimberly is dead and he is surely celebrating. The little guy has a second chance at life and I couldn’t be more pleased. All that TLC and hydrogen peroxide I used made him all better.
My Biggest Challenge
After 6 and a half years of smoking a pack a day, I have decided to give it up once and for all. I have made attempts at quitting in the past, but I have never felt so strong in my resolve as I do now. It has been 48 hours and although I am getting panic attacks and moments of tear inducing anxiety, there is no way that I am going to return to the life I once led. I want out and I want out now. I need the money, I have a desire to be healthy, and I don’t want to be a smoker ever again. Enough is fucking enough. Be strong Joe. Be strong.
My Lil’ Accident
8 hours after quitting smoking, I had a seriously bad moment. I was in the shower, radio blasting, when Paul decided to wash the dishes. I had shampoo in my hair, body all soaped up and was hit with an onslaught of scalding hot water. I backed away from the stream of pain and started screaming at Paul to stop washing the dishes. He couldn’t hear me over the sound of the radio so I reached out of the shower to turn the volume down. Without any warning, my feet gave out from under me and I plunged headfirst onto the bathroom floor. I twisted my ankle and smacked my head against the wall. The pain was excruciating and the tears came immediately. Paul heard me fall and ran to the bathroom door, but it was locked. I reached up and unlocked it and he gasped when he saw my soapy body huddled on the floor in tears. He tried to move me, but the pain was unbearable and I began to throw up in the toilet. It was awful. Eventually he helped me back into the shower so that I could rinse the soap off my body and out of my hair.
Some Bad News
My brother called my family on Friday and told us that he will not be able to come home in January. His leave time was cancelled. We are obviously devastated. When he is released in May, it will be 13 months since we have seen him.
The Theatre Company
Rehearsals start tomorrow for our upcoming AIDS Benefit. I have yet to memorize my monologue and will be spending the next 24 hours doing just that. I am SO glad to have some acting to look forward to. A friend of ours is now doing guest spots on One Life to Live and the fire inside of me burns to be where he is right now. By the end of year…by the end of the year…
My Hair
is wildly out of control. Someone grab the hedge clippers and meet me in the parking lot.
The Real World
Yes I saw Danny’s boyfriend Paul and I have to say…WHA HAPPEN? Paul used to be HOTTTTT. But now Paul is scraggly and skinny. Wha happen?
Also, thank you to MTV for showing The Real World: New Orleans from beginning to end. It was just what this sick boy needed.
The Sims
I got the Sims game for Playstation 2 for Christmas and I have already spent at least 56 hours on it. It’s kind of an irritating game that is mind numbingly addictive. Someone help me help myself.
Adios
That’s it for today.
Hope everyone had a JOYOUS and FUN New Years!
Here’s to a better year. For all of us.
Peace.
